Finding What's Extraordinary In Ordinary Experiences

Many students struggle with what to write about in their personal narratives.  Here is a quote by Irena Smith,  a former Stanford admission officer,  that I find very enlightening. 

“All too often students feel like if they haven’t scaled Mt. Everest with their pet goat while blogging about it, they have nothing to say.  Try to dig a little deeper into your everyday experiences, even if they seem ordinary, and try to find the extraordinary in them.”

The comment was made in a Q&A session as recorded in the book “50 Successful Stanford Application Essays” by Gen and Kelly Tanabe. I’ve always found that, when we dig into our everyday experiences, we can learn a lot about ourselves. Therefore, this comment conveys very well the idea that, while our accomplishments and endeavors can be impressive, what lies within ourselves can also be extraordinary. 

This should provide a relief to many students.  However, to find the extraordinary in ordinary experiences and to convey it in a compelling manner is by no means an easy task. How can we do that well? There isn’t a formula of course; but reading others’ personal narratives and practicing writing ourselves over time can help a great deal.  

We’ll start with a couple of sample successful application essays from the book. One applicant wrote about her “love for exploring language”.  Many students are interested in certain subjects, so what’s extraordinary about hers?  I think it’s the level of her enthusiasm and the authenticity reflected in her writing. In one short paragraph, she lists seven language-related activities she enjoys doing, from journaling to making paradoxical puns. She describes them with the excitement of a kid visiting Disney World and she generously weaves puns and simile into her essay to showcase what she’s learned. 

In addition to all those examples, what makes her writing particularly authentic to me is that she readily admits her flaws, such as her habit of littering her room with books.  She doesn’t mind what others think of her, as if she is emboldened by her passion.  The determination with which she will pursue her “love for exploring language” and the joy she feels make her open and unperturbed.  This is a trait I  often see in people with passions.  The applicant’s energetic and honest portrayal of her intellectual interest makes one eager to help her fulfill her promise. 

Another applicant wrote about a picture of her great-grandmother, whom she called Granny, that she kept in a dresser drawer.  Yes, it’s just a simple and ordinary picture.  Granny passed away long before she was born, but the applicant felt a close bond with Granny as she pieced together the memories from different family members.  Moreover, she drew inspiration from Granny who always carried herself with self-respect and who would “take time to make simple things look beautiful”.  That took on a deeper meaning when we learned that Granny was an uneducated black woman living in segregated St. Louis. 

What is the extraordinary element in this essay? I think it’s the strong bonds the applicant has built with Granny and other family members; in addition, it’s the values she believes in and strives to live by. After her gentle and vivid description of her Granny, the applicant’s voice becomes strong and clear. “I do not believe that pride is arrogance.  Pride is having self-respect and being willing to grow to become a better human being,” she writes. In sharing her own interpretation of pride, she shows us what matters to her. She then builds onto that and declares how she intends to emulate Granny and to do things not because of what others expected of her but because of her own sense of morality and her beliefs. Through the applicant’s genuine description of her values and of her relationship with her extended family, one sees a strong inner foundation for a meaningful life. 

Passions and inspirations are extraordinary. So are characters and values. So are ideas and beliefs, and much more. They carry with them the promise to unlock potentials and to power actions that may change the world. And they are often visible in our everyday activities, in our choices and pursuits, in our thoughts and emotions, even if we don’t scale Mt. Everest with our pet goat while blogging.

In my next article, I’ll share with you some advice on how to practice writing so that you’ll improve your own ability to dig into ordinary experiences and discover the extraordinary.  More importantly, I hope that you will become more extraordinary along the way, over time.